Thoughts

“ Ternyata manusia ini memang tidak layak tersenyum, karena manusia ini bodoh. Kenapa menganggap rasa simpati yang diberikan untuk yang dahulu akan membuat masa depannya baik-baik saja. Manusia ini baru tersadar setelah semua yang dilalui perlahan menipis hilang karena simpati tadi. Manusia ini merasa tidak bersalah ah, padahal manusia ini terlampau batas. Tidak boleh. Manusia ini boleh dicambuk biar merasakan bagaimana rasanya masuk kedalam sumur tanpa oksigen. Beritahu semesta bahwa manusia ini bodoh. Manusia ini meminta maaf. Lagi. “ - barenberry. 

Given my general cockiness, as is common in teenagers around that age, and my gross misunderstanding of the world and problems yet to come, I couldn’t fathom why she needed to write down a small list of 5 to 20 items. “Why do you need a grocery list, mom? Why can’t you just remember it. MOM? I wouldn’t need a grocery list.” And that’s the thing. I didn’t need a grocery list. Once I was able to drive, she frequently sent me out to test my grocery-remembering talents. I specifically remember one time when I went shopping for myself — without a list, of course — and I couldn’t remember the first fucking thing I needed to buy. I was at the Superindo in Griya Bukit Jaya, Bogor. I wandered probably 3 different aisles, then in whichever aisle I was currently at, I stopped, took out my phone and texted my mom: “Mom, I do understand now why we have to using grocery lists. Now I get it.” I had so much going on in my mind that I couldn’t remember what to buy. Amongst the...